Since Western countries, with the US as its special and disgraceful primary example, seem to be treating people who smoke certain plant materials, extraordinarily harsh and uncivilized, I’m seeing it fit to share some tips on how not to get busted by police for tending to your habit or way of life. So, cortesy of Mr_Duck on Thepiratebay.org/.se./.is/.sx, here are the advice you should heed:

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“as a dude who has learned the hard way what doesn’t work, i have a few tips. if i don’t help SOMEBODY out there then i’ve gone to jail for nothing, so please, use my misfortune to your advantage:

– If you find yourself in a sticky situation with a cop, DO NOT SAY ANYTHING, save “I’d like to remain silent”. You have the right to remain silent and in almost every case it will work out better for you if you exercise it. You will be pressured, you will be scared and you will be nervous. Don’t. Say. Anything.

– If you’re facing charges, always, always, always get a damn lawyer. Do research and pick one experienced in the said county. Don’t hire your dads lawyer buddy that has never dealt with the prosecutor and courts of the county you’re in trouble with. Yes, they’ll be happy to take your money, and no, they won’t have the connections and familiarity to do as good of a job. Lawyers are animals.

– If you know a cop doesn’t have reasonable cause(smells, visible drugs, any obvious illegal activity) to search your vehicle, make it clear that you do not consent to a search. Cite that you’d just rather not be using your time for this or that you have somewhere to be or something. Don’t be a legal dick like the law students on youtube. Saying things like ‘sir’, being polite and even making some lighthearted jokes(if you aren’t too nervous) makes you look like you have nothing to be afraid of because you aren’t breaking any laws. Unless of course you really aren’t breaking any laws, go to town in that case.

– God dammit do not fucking smoke and drive. You are asking for it if you do. Smoke BEFORE you drive. If you’re on a long trip, make edibles or take a break at a park or something. If you are stupid enough to, however
a. Only carry what you can eat. If you’re going to smoke in a car, don’t bring your entire half o, bring a joint or two.
b. Save your pieces for home use. Joints rule, because it’s pretty hard to eat a pipe. Use rolling tips(a rolled up piece of cardboard) on the end of the joint/blunt that way you can throw it out after you’re done with it or eat if in an emergency and not even waste bud. Protip: they also hit 100000% better.
c. Every vehicle has great hiding spots, and taking the time to learn them can have a serious positive effect on your future. Door paneling, vents, any crack you can throw stuff in, even if it’s a bitch to get out later is very much worth not getting charges.
d. It’s actually safer to smoke and drive during the day when there are a ton of cars around, because a riced out civic banging 2 16’s looks way more suspicious at 3 am.

– If you’re carrying a sack put it in the fusebox under your hood or underneath the battery. Don’t use the gas lid to hide things in because a K9 will smell right through that.

– If a cop is following you, hell if a cop is 200 feet from you in a different lane, pull off into a gas station/subdivision/anything/even a house. Make it look like you’ve reached your destination.

– If you’re carrying ounces/pounds/anything that won’t fit in the fusebox, you’ll want to use a plastic vacuum wrap machine for storing food like four times over on each half o. Store these in door panels or even taped to the underneath of your car, but in a position that nobody would notice even if they got underneath your car.(On top of panels, etc, each car is different)

– A locked trunk will still get searched and even a locked glovebox. These are stupid as hell hiding places if you can even call them that.

-Buy a can of Ozium from the auto section of walmart. Two or three 1 sec sprays every 5 minutes for 20 minutes will have any smells(real useful for you disgusting cig smokers out there) totally gone.

– It’s kind of a buzzkill, but if you’re with multiple people carrying paraphernelia/personal bud/etc designate who is going to take the fall for what. If 4 dudes in the car all have weed, you could either all get charged with the same possession charge or just one of you. Maybe take turns, whoever has the least charges, whoever is still a minor(looser laws) etc. There’s no point in everyo”